My Easter

My Easter started with me waking up. I then went downstairs and turned my laptop on. After that, I thought I might do a blog about how I spent my Easter day. First I took a picture of my laptop, to prove it.

Then I realised that to truly document the day, I would have needed to get a picture of myself waking up from beneath the covers of my bed, so I went back upstairs, got back in bed and then took a photo of myself pretending to just wake up

While I was up there, pretending, I noticed that I had a lot of dirty washing. I gathered it all up, took it down stairs and put it in the washing machine.

I then had to make the difficult decision of picking either “synthetic wash” or “eco wash” Noticing that eco wash takes almost twice as long, I went for synthetic. Don’t judge me, I needed the extra time for drying my clothes later.

Next, I left the kitchen and re-entered the living room. I noticed the Easter Eggs which were on the table.

Only two of them were for me, from my sister and dad. I thought about how boring it is to be an adult. I also thought about the fact that I don’t really like Nestle chocolate. I didn’t at any point think about Jesus.

After that, I let the cat out. She wanted to go out regardless of the shit weather, which is more than could be said for me.

After I let the cat out, I came back over to my laptop and sat in front of it. I though that I was getting bored of taking photos of boring, minute details of my day and so thought about bringing the blog to it’s conclusion. I took one more photo, which was a photograph of this paragraph and then uploaded it to the blog.

I then realised that I had made a typing error in the paragraph I took a picture of on the line which was supposed to be “I was getting bored of taking photos…” but was instead “I was getting bored to taking photos…” which makes no sense and isnow unfortunately documented forever in digital photograph. I did go back and edit the original sentence though above it.

Then I decided I was going to go back out to the kitchen to make myself a crisp sandwich.

If anything extraordinary does happen on this Easter 2012, I will make an effort to add it to this blog entry, but for now I think it may have peaked.

Mother Mary

I am sitting in an internet cafe in Brighton. tHE COMPUTER I'M SITTING AT HAS A BROKEN KEYBOARD WHERE THE CAPS LOCK KEY GETS STUCK OCCASIONALLY.

The computer I'm at also has a webcam on it. Here is some proof of that last statement

Other than that though, there isn't much more to say about it. I did find this photo in the "pictures" section on the hard drive though.

The Crafty Crucifix

God has me on his calendar...

...I hope he has me on May 25th. May 25th is my birthday. 

Every month or so, there is a new, hand painted sign put up outside this church. I often wonder who paints them. I like to imagine it's the vicar himself. I picture him on his hands and knees, poster paints laid out across the scout hall floor as he franticly scurries around to water his brushes. I picture him sitting at his computer at home in the early hours of the morning, trying to devise new ideas for signs. 

"It's 2012. What can I work with there? End of the world? No, too pessimistic. Ah! The fucking Olympics! Of course. And, I could place a crafty crucifix in the middle of the zero. Take that advertising industry, the church can play with subliminal advertising too"

I liked this sign too, which was put up just before Christmas, but is still there now

I like this sign because it suggests that Jesus, is a baby "not just for Christmas" as opposed to all the other mortal, normal babies who are in fact equal to house pets. Jesus was the kind of baby you had to take care of, walk every day, get de-flead and neuter.

This is your new born baby