Dr Kayden

Omegle is a very interesting website. Basically, it links you with a complete stranger and if they aren't an automated robot that wants to direct you to a hard-core sex website, you can end up having conversations with all sorts of different people.

I am quite fond of playing a completely improvised on the spot character on Omegle. I am vowing to never play the same person twice. Here is my first attempt, in a conversation I had with a Dr Kayden.

You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!

You: My husband is asleep so I only have 5 minutes, so lets make this good ok?

Stranger: Okay!!!!(;

You: Ok great!

You: I'm 41 but look 22

You: honest

Stranger: I'm 35

You: Not a huge age gap then!

You: He's asleep upstairs

You: if he knew I was on here, he would go mental

You: So, tell me about yourself

Stranger: Well I am single good looking I work at a hospital as a Nero surgeon

You: wow!

You: a professional

You: you know how brains work

Stranger: Yes

You: I used to be an interior decorator

You: but I had to quit

Stranger: Why?

You: Now I just look after my garden

You: Because my husband won't let me work

You: he insists on being the man

You: He is a lawyer in the city

Stranger: Awww that sucks. And cool cool

You: it's not cool, hes a bastard

You: I want to chop his dick off

Stranger: Ohhhh. Why are you still with him then?

You: Because we have 2 kids and hes a good dad

You: just a lousy husband

Stranger: Ohhhh okay

You: btw

You: I'm not really 44

You: I'm 45

You: I feel like I need to be honest with you

You: I feel a bond to you

You: My Psychic crystals are shimmring

You: they like you

Stranger: Ohhh??

Stranger: Well good!

You: Where do you live?

Stranger: Cali. You?

You: California? Right, I'm booking a plane first thing in the morning

You: I live in Texas

Stranger: Oh!

You: Is it ok if I bring my kids?

Stranger: Yes California is resllynice

Stranger: Really nice*

You: Do you have a room for them both?

Stranger: no?

You: Ok, I'll have to just bring one then

Stranger: Ok

You: choosing is going to be difficult

Stranger: Mmhmm

You: You're so good for letting me come and stay with you

Stranger: Nooooo

You: No?

You: I thought it was settled

You: I come to Cali tomorrow

You: you pick me up

Stranger: You don't know why part o live in!!!

You: I'll call you when I get to the airport

Stranger: Good lick with that

Stranger: Luck*

You: Can I have your number now just in case?

Stranger: no

You: Ok, ill give you mine

Stranger: ????

You: Just a second

Stranger: Wtf

You: You're a doll

You: 1 scond

Stranger: Wttttfffffff

You: its 1832 615 2848

Stranger: nooo

You: I'll book the tickets for tomorrow morning

You: bring 1 kid

You: Bobby probably

Stranger: Have fun

You: Charlotte can be a brat

You: she likes her daddy more anyways

Stranger: Your a freak

You: I'm not

You: honestly

You: thats whay my husband says to me

You: but I'm really not

You: I just need out

You: a new life

Stranger: I wonder why!!??!?

You: in Cali

You: We could get married?

Stranger: No thank you

You: You could be Bobbys new neurosurgeon daddy

Stranger: Nopee

You: I thought we had something together

Stranger: Fuck you

You: Not until we're married

Stranger: Grooss I wouldn't want to

Stranger: Freeeeaaaak

You: Honey, you're no spring chicken. 35?

You: You could do with some mature lovin

Stranger: Gross

You: I'm 45, I know things

Stranger: Nasty

You: It aint nasty

You: you'd really be helping me out

You: If I stay here any longer I'm going to end up...

You: I dont know

You: cutting his dick off!

Stranger: Ok

You: Ok? So it's settled then?

Stranger: Nipe

Stranger: Nopr

Stranger: Nope!!!!

You: http://www.cheapflights.com/flights-to-california/from-texas/

You: I found some good deals online see

Stranger: Noooo noooo noooo

You: You call me tomorrow at about 7

You: and we can arrange a pick up time

You: My name is Paula by the way

You: whats yours?

Stranger: Fuck off psycho bitch!

You: Come on, you don't mean that

You: Bobby needs a new daddy

You: Hold on, I'll go and wake him up

You: We can leave tonight

You: Would that be better for you?

Stranger: You craaaaaaazzzzzy! Bitch!

You: you'll really like him

You: he's 12

You: Not the smartest boy, but boy howdy does he like runnin'

You: But you're a doctor right?

You: you can teach him up good

Stranger: Nope!!

You: What happened?

You: We hit it off so good

You: Now you're colder than a chicken butt in winter

You: Was it something I said?

You: Listen. I know what's puttin' you off

You: I'll come alone

You: Bobby and Charlotte will be fine with their daddy

Stranger: I done even know what to say u

Stranger: N

You: I'm literally about 2 clicks away from orderin' these here plane tickets so I need to know for sure that you're gonna be there

Stranger: Do it

You: 1 click away now hon

You: Really?

You: You'll be there?

You: at the airport

You: You'll call me right?

Stranger: Yes(:

You: It's done

You: I leave tomorrow at 12:40

You: I can't wait to meet you

You: This feels so right

You: Please, tell me your name

You: I'm gonna be landing in Fresno Airport

You: you can get there right?

You: Darlin?

Stranger: Ok its kayden

You: Aw Kayden!

You: that's a beautiful name

Stranger: Iknpw

You: How much money do you make Kayden?

Stranger: Alot

You: Hot dog!

Stranger: Mmhmm

You: Shit

You: I can hear Keith

You: He's calling out in his sleep again

Stranger: Uh oh

You: I hate the bastard, but I think you saved his dick Kayden

Stranger: Ok

You: Remember to call me about 7 ok hon?

Stranger: Alright

You: Goodnight Kayden, my sweet prince

Stranger: Goodnight

You: I love you

Stranger: Umm?

And that was our conversation. Pretty special wasn't it? Now I can develop that into a script, sell the rights to Universal Pictures and secure a big fancy pay cheque as a screen writer in Hollywood.